Safe & Sound – A Film by Alejandro Ibarra

Mom everybody, thank you so much for coming. I invited you here tonight because no no, no no. Hey guys guess what oh no, I can’t do it like that You know what Life is really just a journey filled with obstacles and stupid stupid speeches. God damn it Mommy, my heart. My life. Nothing Do you always speak in Spanish when you’re alone? No no no um hi you look fancy Oh, thanks. I had a teacher conference after school today. Hey, why is the kitchen full of smoke? Oh, I’m so sorry the oven went crazy and burnt dinner. I had to start all over again. Really? The ‘oven’ burnt dinner? Is that a tone I’m hearing uh you know, I know how to cook shit, thank you very much I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I don’t I don’t mean to be cranky. I’m just a little nervous. I guess. Yeah, I can tell. Other than that, how are you feeling? Yeah fine good um dinner’s gonna be ready in time anyway, so then it’ll be fine. I’ll be fine. They’re not gonna be here for another hour. Okay, oh right through your family. Oh, you just gotta do it. Yeah. I know I know but I Just really worried about my mom. You know. I really think she’s just gonna. Yeah, cuz she’s your mom and she loves you Sometimes too much Look it doesn’t matter when you tell them or how you tell them. It’s not gonna be any less shocking or anything Thank you great. Thank you so much for that that makes me feel wonderful. look just relax all right Look I got plenty of wine and we’ll be sure to feed them before you tell them Your people are always happier on the full stomach Excuse me that is very racist But very accurate yes, let’s do that (Knock, Knock, knock) Is that your sister? no she’s always late. is it your mom? No, she wouldn’t knock. My God, that’s them. it is them. Oh my god. Why are they here so early? July relax. breath deep breaths. It’s gonna be okay. All right look you go open the door We’ll give me some chips or something here look at me Hey, let’s get you fixed up We’ll make you look nice and pretty. And everything’s gonna be great. I promise Hey look you look handsome all right great. Okay, okay? Yeah, okay, okay? Okay coming Coming yeah, yeah coming (off screen) Pregnant lady man (off screen) woman: Knock again. You knock. My love! Hi, oh my god How’s my nephew? Alberto! Hey man! How ya doing? My love! My son. Come on, I’m going to make you a lot of tamales. You’re very skinny. Makes me nervous. Hey guys, I didn’t know you guys are gonna be coming here this early so dinners Not totally ready, but it will be soon, so you know just relax get comfy But I thought you said to come at six? Yeah, no I think I said 7:00 This it looks really nice I heard six. Six, seven. You know. Same thing. So like your shirt nice man Yeah, thanks man! Baby daddy. Made it myself Oh really Since you know I don’t have this to tell people right and to make sure they know. And that Disney font. That’s what pops Got it smoky in here. Oh, yeah, I know I had a little accident in the kitchen But you know that’s why I dinner is gonna be a little late say like one hour. Since when do you cook in the kitchen? It was the oven you know it went a little crazy. So let me ask you something you’re gonna ride with us to Lorena’s quinceanera or you gonna take your own car? Also, I couldn’t get a plus-one just so you know Couldn’t or it didn’t want to? What did you say? You know what it’s fine. I’m not gonna be able to use it anyway. Oh Why do you mean you’re not gonna need it anyway why do you mean by that? Yeah, what’s going on? Where’s Daniel at? Uh guys, I I Wanted to invite you over tonight because I wanted to say oh You invited us here because you wanted to tell us that you broke up with what’s-his-name. Why would you think that? No, Mom, okay, it’s Daniel and- Daniel: Who broke up? Nice. I wondered where you were. It’s been a bit huh, how’s little Albert? Alberto. That’s right. Alberto It’s so much better That’s what I was gonna say Hey, Maggie. How are you? It”s Mrs.. Gonzales. I’m okay. mom, right So Who broke up? What? Your mom just mentioned that somebody broke up. Oh yeah, that’s us. Oh We’re breaking up? oh no no, it’s just that’s what they thought the reason was for me inviting them here tonight. What’s the special occasion then? Guys… I Oh my God, you guys are getting married! I love you. Congratulations! My brother is getting married! This is not necessary. who proposed to who? Whom! I didn’t propose. Who pays for the wedding? You know like because usually it’s the bride. Okay, I can’t do this right now. You don’t ask who the bride is to a gay couple. Guys, please. Because it’s offensive. And they’re very sensitive. No, that’s offensive Shut up, you know what I mean. Okay guys guys, I’m gonna be the bridesmaid right? I have cancer What? What did you say? I have cancer So you’re not getting married Why are you talking about ‘you have cancer’? What do you mean? What am I talking about? I have cancer. how many times not to say it? So you mean you have like go hmm? cancer cancer. I Don’t understand that question. What type of cancer is it? It’s a skin cancer technically Skin cancer… That’s curable. Right? Guys, Sam’s sick. I may vomit No, but you know guys hey. Hey, it’s it’s gonna be fine. Okay. You’re right. I’m okay. You know I have a great doctor, and he’s very optimistic about the prognosis, so You know I just need to start treatment, which is why I can’t go to the Quinceanara now. You know I have to go to an appointment that day, but it’ll be fine. It’ll be fine. Sure, it’s gonna be fine. We’ll be here for anything you need okay? food, hugs, anything. Yeah, okay? Thank you. Thank you. It’s gonna be all right, buddy Hey, ma you haven’t said much, you okay? this is because of you What? ever since he met you his whole life has fallen apart Mrs.. Gonzalez, I know you’re upset but- every decision about his lifestyle, his future Everything that is wrong with him is here right now. What are you doing? You can’t talk to my boyfriend like that! Tell you this if he hadn’t met you he wouldn’t have cancer right now You think that I’m the reason Sam has cancer? I think you’re the reason Sam has Cancer. You think I gave Sam cancer? yeah, you are the reason for all this. Ridiculous, are you listening to yourself have you listened to a fucking thing you said all day Well, you know what what do I don’t care. What you? You look like you care. You just love trying to scare away anybody that gets close Sam because you’re afraid that one day- He won’t come running back to you guess what it doesn’t matter what you do. I’m gonna keep fucking coming back You know why because I fucking care about Sam. Yes, not that guy stop? What are you serious right now? Seriously! you guys kidding me right now? Mom I know this can be hard to process and to hear but you don’t seriously believe that Danny’s the reason I have cancer, do you? That doesn’t even make any fucking sense? It’s not something he can give me. It’s not like the flu or an STD okay? not that we have any STDs Okay, we use protection so where it should be fine on that front, but I’m gonna be honest with you for a moment I Still don’t understand what invalid reasons you have about not Completely accepting Danny in my life are but you know what I don’t give a fuck at this point because there’s nothing to do with That or with either of you. Does anybody here know what the worst thing a cancer patient can have during treatment this, huh? anybody? hm anybody? no no? Stress Yes, Thank You Danny. stress. And you want the two of you are doing me right now? Yeah So I’m gonna ask the two of you to get over your shit because I need you okay? both of you do you guys smell something burning? Goddamn it. So what are you guys thinking for dinner? Can I Get some Hawaiian? honey, I’m sorry. Never mind it can wait. I Don’t know what came over me. I don’t know why that came out of my mouth I And you know you’re wrong I… This has everything to do with us it has everything to do with all of us And I cannot lose you. I just I cannot lose you. I cannot lose you. And Daniel, I just want- I know. me too. Take the pepperonis off and have some salad. Get used to it. Be like this for a while? Are you okay? Are you okay Breath through your nose. Easy guys. Just went down the wrong pipe Calm down crazies. I think I have five more gray hairs Can you give me another one? No, Mommy. You’ve had too much It’s for your baby! Oh, another one? Hey, how ya feeling? good. yeah, good. how you feeling? Doing all right I guess. Why do you always do that to me? No, you look really cute tonight, I love that shirt on you it brings out your eyes So I was in the kitchen cleaning and you were nowhere to be found Right. about that. I wanted to help you clean, but I have- Cancer don’t know if you heard. you are such a jerk You know as weird as that was I would say it went surprisingly well. Yeah, I guess so. hey, I forgot to tell you dr. Schwartz called earlier to check on you and confirm your next appointment. Told that we were doing pretty good, and you hadn’t really felt any side effects, and he was pretty surprised about that It’s Okay. Don’t do that You know it’s just gonna keep falling out right? So we’ll shave your head. I bet you look stupidly handsome as a bald man. I know I’m okay with this, but are you gonna be okay with it? You don’t have to- yes, of course. I’m okay with it Why would I not be okay with this? That’s ridiculous Okay. I wasn’t Planning on doing this today, but I have something for you that I think will Make you feel a lot better about everything that’s going on One second. Okay, I hope it’s not a wig. You know the only wig I like is Kristen Wiig, It’s definitely not a wig. Danny.. What are you doing? What is that? Do I really need to elaborate? Okay. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Okay, I I don’t want you to feel pressured because of the cancer. Would you would stop it? I’m doing this because I love you period So, are you in? Of course I’m in I’m so in oh my god. I’m so in this is really happening- But it’s just maybe a little too Yeah, it’s a little loose, but no we’ll get it resized. That’s fine. Those are easy to do um. Oh My god do it I need to get you one now, don’t I? That’s how this works right? I’m not sure maybe? I don’t know. We’re engaged oh my god, what is happening oh? You know what I guess we’re gonna have to invite my family over again to tell them I’m gonna take it back. on oh no you can’t you are stuck mister you are stuck

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