This is our year!
We’re gonna kill it at the, uh, the big contest thing! The big contest thing?!
I think you mean the “So You Think You Can App”
App design contest! Yes! That’s the one! Yeah! The winner of this contest gets a key to the famous Silicon Campus
and use of the best computers in the world.
And a gigantic check! It’s definitely the most important
event of our career… And it’s in a few hours… It would be
good if Tom was, you know, prepared. Okay, so here’s the plan:
When they introduce me, first, I’m gonna run across the stage with my hand to my ear like,
“I can’t heeeear you!” Then I’ll chicken-walk to the side of the stage but I’ll go too far, see? Then when the audience is like, “Where’s Talking Tom going?” I’ll spin around and moonwalk
right back to center stage! The only way we’re going to
“kill it”, which I take to mean “win the contest” is if you make it sound like you actually understand the features of the app you’ll be talking about. Yeah, Yeah, whatever…. Tom, give that back! Save the nerd speak for the
“terms and conditions” that nobody reads. Okay? Do you worry about a phone thief getting
all of your private information? Well, your worries are over thanks to our
new Shockingly Secure Antitheft App! Wait, Tom, don’t turn it on! Here’s how it works Tom, are you Okay? Wow! Your voice?!
What’s wrong with your voice? – This app is…
– Shockingly effective. Welcome to Doctor Internet!
This is the Internet, we could be anywhere! Don’t try to find us. Please state
your name and what’s wrong. Oh. Uh… My name is Talking Tom…
And Ben tasered my neck area. What?! This is your fault,
Tom, not mine! Ben, settle down.
Let the Internet Doctor work. Well then, open wide and let’s take a look. Aaaaah… P-yew! P-yew! P-yew! P-yew! Now please hold while I make a diagnosis. In my ten years as an online doctor
and four years of online medical school I have never seen vocal cords this inflamed. OK, well, what can we do
to help him get better? I’m afraid there’s not much you can do,
he’ll just have to stop talking for a week and let his vocal cords get better. Stop talking?! He can’t! Today is the “So You
Think You Can App” App contest! That’s big time! I hear the winner
of that gets a gigantic check. And a key to Silicon Campus! Can I talk today, and then just not talk tomorrow? You could, but if you do, you risk
damaging your voice so badly that… you may never talk again! Whelp… What’s that nurse?
Oh, time for my emergency medical surgery thingy. I got to go. Surgery elevator
going down to the surgery floor! Wow… He has his own surgery elevator… This was our year. Don’t talk. The doctor said don’t talk or you
could lose your voice forever. But I’m Talking Tom, I can’t not talk. Have you ever tried? It’s just a week of no talking.
You can do it. Just drop out of the competition.
You’ll get ‘em next year! Next year? Do you really
think I’m gonna drop out of the “So You Think
You Can App” App contest?! The biggest App contest of our careers? Yeah. You kinda have to. I mean,
you did electrocute your partner. He electrocuted himself! You listen up for once, Talking Tom!
You told me something today, and you said it without words.
Do you know what you said? You said, “Ben, you can’t really
rely on me because I don’t listen.” I’m not finished!
And you know what else you said without saying a word?!
You said, “Ben, I don’t take our business seriously, so you
better learn how to do this alone.” What?! Did you just mumble,
“Ben, if you do the competition without me you’ll ruin our company because
you’re a terrible public speaker?!” Well since you can’t talk and I can,
I’d say right now I’m a better public speaker than you are!
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a presentation to give.
Alone. By myself. Don’t worry Tom,
Angela is making something that will fix your voice! Okay?! Do you understand what I’m saying right now? He lost his voice, Hank,
not his hearing. Oh,Tom since you can hear me,
I’m going to stop yelling at you, Okay? My grandmother was a great healer.
She had a home remedy that could cure anything. Try this. You know what? It was my aunt who had all the home remedies. My grandmother was a chili pepper farmer,
and had a restaurant that served… chili peppers mostly. Hey, neighbour! You don’t mind if
I borrow a few things, do you? Just say no if you don’t want me to have it! Well… Okay, thanks, bye! Welcome… to the third annual
“So You Think You Can App” App contest! Our data shows that there is no better way
to nurture creativity in young minds than through competition and humiliation. And that’s the reason we’re here…
for the competition. And the humiliation. And to award one lucky team of
App developers this key to my world famous Silicon Campus! Oh. And this gigantic check! Look at the size of that… Anyway, let’s get started
and bring out the first App contestant… I feel like we should go to the
contest and support Ben. So do I…
What about you, Tom? I could tell part of Tom
wanted to go support his friend, and part of Tom was being stubborn.
We really needed someone to talk to. Welcome to the Internet Therapist.
That’s me. Online since… What’s the day… Wednesday? Hey, aren’t you the Internet Doctor? Hmm, interesting point.
For now let’s focus on Tom’s conflict. Okay? Okay. I’m focused. Tom, are you angry at Ben? But do you still consider
Ben your business partner? And would you expect him to share
that gigantic check if he won the contest? Well, then you sound sane to me. Dr. Internet Therapist,
your next patient is here. Looks like our time is up…
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have urgent matters back at the asylum. 30 minutes later… I don’t know what made
that person think they could App. Not a very good idea
for an App at all, was it? Are you having as much fun as I am? Probably not since I make more
money in a minute than most of you will make your whole life. I’m just kidding. I think. Someone figure out how much I make in a minute. Meanwhile, let’s welcome to the
stage our next competitors… Ah… Talking Tom and Ben! Let’s see… I can’t hear you! Wait, that card was out of order. Good afternoon, everybody! Would you like to hear some interesting crime statistics
related to mobile phone theft?! I can’t let them treat Ben like this! Tom, wait! Tom, what are you doing? You can never tell how much
you care about something until you realize it can be taken away from you Then why are you talking?! Because it’s not my voice
I’m worried about losing… it’s you! That’s the stupidest
thing that I’ve ever heard! We are partners and I want you
to know I’m here for you no matter what. Now let’s win this thing! It is not worth it Tom.
I won’t let you talk! Give it to me. Hey, give me that! Tom! Okay, that’s enough.
Off my stage, both of you! Well, those two certainly can’t App.
I mean, what a total disaster. I guess this is mine now, right?
Finders keepers… Oooooooooooh! If there’s anything I learned today,
it’s that Tom might be a lousy listener but Leftover soup. Bon appetite! Oh, thank you. Like I was saying, Tom is a lousy listener,
but he’s also a reliable business partner. Stop it. I know you’re just
trying to make me uncomfortable. Oh boy, soup! Just say no if you
don’t want me to have it! No! Okay, thanks, bye! Tom, he is taking your soup! Shhhhhhh!